December 31, 2006

Weenis of the Week

I've been behind on posting a Weenis of the Week lately. I finally found something I feel is worthy of weenis status.



The fool who actually TRIED USING A CURLING IRON TO CURL THEIR EYELASHES, prompting the necessity of having to label every single curling iron ever manufactured, is a WEENIS.

The worst part of this stupidity is knowing the curling iron company probably got sued and had to pay a huge settlement to the weenis who did this to themselves.

The second worst part is knowing that I won't be taking this label off of my own curling iron. And I don't know why.

18 comments:

Cadillac said...

Well, I'm sorry, but I happen to be thankful for the important public notice those teeny tags provide.

To think of it, me almost curling my eyelashes without even knowing my eyeballs were in such danger.

Thank you, Mr. Tag maker, whomever you are.

Anonymous said...

LOL, I've always hated the tags on beds and pillows...very intimidating to remove!!
There are so many weenis's out there...especially running our government!! Maybe politicians should come with tags!!

montchan said...

Ok, so what about pubic hair? Is it OK to use a curling iron down there? I haven't seen any warning labels about that. Does that mean that if I burn my hooha, I can sue and get a huge settlement? I could really use somecash...

Anonymous said...

ROFLMAO! Only montchan would want to curl her pubic hair, hehehe. In fact, I can just see her now, scouring the internet for merkins...JUST so she can curl them *grin*. Just kidding...I was having so much fun laughing I couldn't stop myself.

Eight Hour Lunch said...

Why would anyone want to use it on your err...natural curls?? Eeek!

As for the curling iron, I had a ballroom dance teacher at BYU that melted her contact to her eye with a curling iron. So it happens. Just not in the physics department.

Sister Mary Lisa said...

Cadillac, you dodged a bullet. Or a burnt eye. Whew!

Joom, politicians do come with tags. Visible only to non-politicians: they are located on their backs, reading "Kick Me, I'm a Dork"

Montchan, I can just see that tag added to the one with an eye: the hooha (hilarious by the way) illustrated with a big curling iron near it with a big NO slash through it. I imagine there are horror stories in the medical field already involving curling irons and hoohas.

Kitten, Montchan is hilarious, I agree.

EHL, I'm sure it's happened. It's probably preferable to take a curling iron to the pubes than it is to take an eyelash curler to them. Seriously. Not that I've tried either, of course.

Your ballroom dance teacher was obviously a weenis, because who on God's Green Earth would ever ADMIT they had melted a contact to their eye?? God.

Cele said...

I think next week's Weenis Award should go to the jury that found the curling iron company in error and awarded this week's Weenis a tidy sum for compensation, pain, and a life time of false lashes.

Now can you imagine Montchan wearing those pink sponge curlers to get the same effect?

Anonymous said...

So SML,
All this talk of weenies and hoohaas, it is making me hotter than a curling iron.

I do agree though that for the short and curlies a straightener would be more apropos -- or just grab a razor.

Do they have warnings on razors? I just went and checked and apparently there are no warnings on the razors about cutting off -- your eyelashes.

Sister Mary Lisa said...

Cele, I laughed out loud on the picture of Montchan with pink curlers. Hilarious. That would be interesting to sleep with...

TW, sorry about giving you reactions. I had to laugh at the image of you heading to the cabinet to check out your razor and any warnings on it. Funny.

Anonymous said...

And I thought the warning not to use it in the bathtub was bad.

This was great, SML. I can't stop shaking my head at the absurdity.

Jazzy said...

LOL! This was a good one!

montchan said...

people!!! Not everybody's hoohaa hair is CURLY!!! That is WHY I would like the curling iron trick. Or the pink curlers. ANYTHING that would get me a huge settlement.

or alternately, a straightener. Do they even have those warnings on a bottle of straightener? I gotta investigate.

Freckle Face Girl said...

Ouch to the big weirdo that even thought to try that! - Happy New Years!

Anonymous said...

Ha ha, imagine explaining at the emergency room how the eyes got burnt! Eyelash curling, ha ha!

Cele said...

One of my daughters works in an emergency room, as the er clerk. Apparently, Gem, they wouldn't be surprised - or maybe they would, it's a reasonable injury. well kinda.

Anonymous said...

I just bought a new curling iron and it had nothing about not curling my eyelashes with it.
I smell a lawsuit waiting to happen... or is that burning flesh?

Anonymous said...

Please, you all sound so surprised! We've all gone to high school and know how easy it is to do serious injury to your neck with one of these devices. Heck, I'm a boy and know. I don't think it's that far a stretch to find that they're just as likely to cause burn "marks" in the pubic region. I'll admit that the eye is a little unusual, but I can see a slip if you're trying it out in car, someone else's house, or a club. Who am I to say, but in the words of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, "He who is without sin, cast the first curling iron"!

Melliferous Pants said...

I only wish my curling iron had displayed the same warning...