February 26, 2008

She's hilarious

My daughter came into my bedroom a few Sundays ago to tell me that she had seen Gordon B. Hinckley's* funeral on TV at her best friend's house the previous day. She said to me that she had almost forgotten all about Gordon B. Hinckley. I asked her if anyone tried to talk to her about him, she said no. She said the funeral was WAY LONG and BORING. I asked, "How much of it did you watch? Did any of your friend's family cry?"

"My friend's older sister almost cried. Sheesh, it was hours long, Mom! But I did think of one thing that woulda been funny. There was this one part where it was silent on the TV for a reeeeaaaally long time. I sat there thinking how hilarious it'd be if someone in the congregation stood up and started sobbing really loud into the crowd like Buuuuuhhhh Huuhhhhhhhh Huuuuhhhhhhhh!" She stood up on my bed and acted all melodramatic when she did that.

She collapsed into giggles at her own humor and so did I. She's so damn funny! Just thinking about her little 10 year old voice trying to do deep sobbing like that makes me laugh out loud again now.

*He was the president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints until his death, considered by members of the church to be a prophet of God. I wanted to wait a bit before posting this so the sadness anyone felt for his death could be dealt with before humor was brought out about it.

February 21, 2008

Memememe iiiiiiiiii.

Thanks to my friend Wry Catcher for peer-pressuring me into posting this meme.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Nope. But my mom and her sister-in-law were racing to have a girl first so they could name her Lisa. Obviously Mom won. My aunt ended up naming her youngest daughter Alissa, the closest she could get to Lisa, she said.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Ummm...a month ago? Can't recall.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Sometimes. Especially when I'm the only one who can read it.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Tuna in tuna salad.

5. HAVE YOU ANY CHILDREN? 3.5 Two daughters, a son, and a wiener dog.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Probably. I'm friends with all kinds. Heh.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Um, duh. Especially when my brothers are around. Good god, that's fun.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes. Not sure why anyone would care.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Only with that special someone... You know, the one who doesn't mind if I pee my pants.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Probably Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds. Or Lucky Charms.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Yup. Again, not sure who cares. Is this the best they could come up with for a question??

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Depends on who I'm trying to carry around.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Not a huge fan, but recently discovered Ben & Jerry's Willie Nelson's Country Peach Cobbler, which is pretty damn tasty.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? In person: eyes. Online: humor, wit, and engaging writing style.

15. RED OR PINK? Red, although Pink has some killer songs I love.

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? That's for me to know and you to find out. I'm guessing if you read my whole blog, you'll find at least five things to answer this question. What? FINE. You'll probably find at least ten.

17. DOG OR CAT PERSON? Dog person. I'm not into cats so much, although listening to my brother Eric talk about his cats makes my heart smile.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE YOU KNOW TO DO THIS MEME? Hell no. I hate putting people on the spot en masse.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? No shoes. Cream, red, and green plaid flannel lounge pants. Cold is not sexy.

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Ugh. McDonald's chicken nuggets just before my son's soccer game tonight. Remind me not to try that again. Ish.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The Science Channel on TV talking about forest landscapes and forest fires.


23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Wet wood after the rain. Fresh laundry when fabric softener has been used. My daughter's hair as she snuggles me after her bath.



26. WHICH SPORT DO YOU ENJOY WATCHING MOST? Soccer, when my son's in goal.

27. HAIR COLOR? Dark blonde

28. EYE COLOR? Blue

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACT LENSES? Only if I want to see.

30. FAVORITE FOOD? Steak (medium rare) and potatoes, when my favorite North African restaurant in Paris isn't available.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings. I'm a hopeless romantic.


33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Gray sweatshirt over white tank top. I mentioned it's cold, right?

34. SUMMER OR WINTER? I like the four seasons. Spring and fall are best.

35. HUGS OR KISSES? Yes. I suppose the better question would be VERTICAL OR HORIZONTAL?

36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Hmmm...the kind shared with friends. One dish, two (or more) spoons.

37. DAWN FRENCH OR CAROL BURNETT? Carol Burnett, since I'm too lazy right now to google who the hell Dawn French even is.

38. SPAGHETTI OR LASAGNA? TACOS OR BURRITOS? HAMBURGERS OR HOT DOGS? Spaghetti (although I do love lasagna too). Burritos. Hot Dogs.

39. WHAT BOOK(S) ARE YOU READING NOW? "Dance of the Dissident Daughter" by Sue Monk Kidd. Highly recommend this book to all. It describes very well the journey I feel I'm on as a woman.

40. WHAT’S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? My laptop has no mouse.

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? The first half of Amistad.

42. FAVORITE SOUND? Music mixes that are gifted to me.


44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? When I traveled to Europe. Both times.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Oh yes. I have a few...... Am I supposed to LIST THEM??


And...because it truly does feel strange to stop at number 46, I shall make up a few more irrelevant questions:

47. WHY DO YOU DO MEMES? I don't know. I am a sheep.


49. CANDLES OR INCENSE? Candles. People look better in candlelight. Besides, incense gives me a killer headache in 3.8 seconds flat.

50. MOUNTAIN CABIN OR BEACH HOUSE? Tough call. I love trees, but I think I prefer the ocean. Both, if I win the lottery.

February 7, 2008

Poor FedEx guy

I was working this morning when the FedEx delivery guy walked in with a 7-foot high box. As I'm supposed to do, I walked around my reception desk to inspect the box for damage. I saw nothing wrong and he handed me his electronic tracking device to sign and said, "Looks good."

I was still signing and said, "And we love when our boxes look good, don't we?"

It wasn't until I looked up as I was handing back his pen that I realized what I'd said.


February 2, 2008

As overheard tonight in the ladies' room

Woman in Stall #1: So anyway, like, I'm a fucking clean freak, you should probably know.

Woman in Stall #2: Oh good! Me too! That'll help that we both are!!

#1: I mean, like, I'm probably OCD or something. I gotta have it spotless at all times. Seriously. All. The. Time.

#2: Me too! He totally whipped me into shape and now all I want to do is clean. I obsess. Seriously.

#1: Good. That means it should totally work out great then.

#2: Totally. That's so cool!

(They both flush and leave their stalls)

#1: I like totally need to go bra shopping too.

#2: I just need boobs, period.

#1: Oh, that too. I hate bra shopping.

#2: Totally me too.

February 1, 2008

So much for resolutions

I had a resolution to try to blog more often in 2008 (maybe a New Year's resolution, maybe not ~ I prefer to keep myself non-committal on these things) and I've been pretty bad so far at writing more. I do have some ideas for what I'd like to write when I finally take the time, so at least we know it's not writer's block or anything like that.

This week, however, I have an excuse. My hell week (billing clients) got bumped up by over a week this month and I'm hauling patootie today trying to get as much done as I can. Wish me luck. I was at work until almost ten last night so I am dragging pretty good right now.

Hope the weekend is relaxing for you.