tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post5057247096655581201..comments2023-10-21T05:05:55.779-05:00Comments on Thoughts by Sister Mary Lisa: Growing Up Mormon - Youth Temple Trip PreparationSister Mary Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00642154849765529070noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-30480688266755438542009-03-25T12:12:00.000-05:002009-03-25T12:12:00.000-05:00Being a Latter Day Saint is not about what it port...Being a Latter Day Saint is not about what it portrays or makes itself out to be. It is only what we receive spiritually and are able to accept of what we have been given. It was once told to me, that we are who we are when no one is looking. My bishop once told me that if we all had 18 things to "get", some may "get" 16 and still have to struggle with the last 2, where someone else may "get" 3 and all they need is 3.<BR/>If you are having a hard time leaving the church, perhaps you may want to keep the things that you know are true and ask that you will be in your rightful place in GOD's world a couple or 3 times a day, even each time you think of it. Your prayers will be answered. The Love never stops and the sparkle that you feel behind your eyes. that makes its way into what you see, when you look out at the beauty of what you know is spiritually real will always be right where you put it. The very best to you and all the love you will accept.sister sherrellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11342515216778818142noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-33207178901048156812007-09-23T20:26:00.000-05:002007-09-23T20:26:00.000-05:00Wow! I remember being interviewed by the bishop fo...Wow! I remember being interviewed by the bishop for a temple trip and he asked me if I masturbated. I figured that it was worse to lie than to do what I been doing forever. So I said that I did. He asked me what I thought of when I did it. I told him, quite honestly, that I didn't think of anything as it was all very innocent and abstract. He told me that I could go to the temple if I refrained from doing so for 3 weeks. Longest 3 weeks of my life. <BR/><BR/>Steebie WeebieAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-64239509655603245052007-08-13T09:42:00.000-05:002007-08-13T09:42:00.000-05:00Janet-And this is one more reason why Mormon clerg...Janet-<BR/><BR/><I>And this is one more reason why Mormon clergy ought to be trained and certified in pastoral care and counseling.</I><BR/><BR/>Amen!<BR/><BR/>Since I have left the LDS church, I have realized more and more what total crap having a lay clergy is. This is not to say that professional clergy always do the right thing, but at least there's some training involved, and the practical consequences of screwing up are more weighty. A Mormon bishop goes over the line and he just gets released; no skin off his back. A Christian pastor (particularly in a larger, established denomination) goes over the line, and it's time to find a new career.<BR/><BR/>I'm sure there's no perfect system, but I'm also sure that the LDS system is unacceptable.<BR/><BR/>But of course the standard Mormon "it's a feature, not a bug" answer is that when Bishops are abusive it 's because God wanted to teach you something, or to give you the opportunity to learn forgiveness. Or some crap like that.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-9068935907524668292007-08-12T00:54:00.000-05:002007-08-12T00:54:00.000-05:00Stories like this confirm my decision to leave. T...Stories like this confirm my decision to leave. The fact that my daughters will never be put in a similar situation is extremely comforting.Donhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09488350535622852828noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-734871953350500412007-08-08T08:38:00.000-05:002007-08-08T08:38:00.000-05:00First I wanna know how you get so many comments an...First I wanna know how you get so many comments and readers...second...have you kissed a boy yet? How was it? Was it wet, or dry or sloppy...? He he he<BR/><BR/>I would never allow my daughter into a bish interview alone if I were Mormon. Too many freaks.<BR/><BR/>{shudder}<BR/><BR/>xoxoja :0)JulieAnnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02905677646104943660noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-64848804702553800042007-08-07T18:47:00.000-05:002007-08-07T18:47:00.000-05:00I've got to piggy back on your mom's comment. I re...I've got to piggy back on your mom's comment. I remember when I told my parents about Bishop Wilcox, my mother was FURIOUS! She said, if she'd known that's what he was going to ask, she wouldn't have sent me to that interview. Up until I left the church, I hated--I mean HATED--bishop's interviews. Unfortunately, in my experience, the majority of bishops were this way. I can only think of two bishops I ever had who I felt comfortable around. The rest were sickos and bastards!<BR/><BR/>P.S. When I told my therapist the Bishop Wilcox story and the fact that I didn't tell anyone for years, she said that his behavior was akin to sexual abuse. He may not have touched me physically, but the fact that I didn't tell anyone meant I felt violated and is typical of kids who have been molested. They fear the supposed power of the person who's abused them and they don't tell anyone for fear they either won't be taken seriously or they'll get in trouble. Either way--it's sick and wrong. And this is one more reason why Mormon clergy ought to be trained and certified in pastoral care and counselingJanet Kincaidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01396294382570650966noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-29653697486870029632007-08-07T11:32:00.000-05:002007-08-07T11:32:00.000-05:00SML, its interesting to look back on those experie...SML, its interesting to look back on those experiences with new eyes and think to myself "What the hell!!??". I was always asked if I masturbated by my Bishops and I thought that it was a valid question to determine my worthiness. Now I see it as creepy, although your story is mucho creepier.<BR/><BR/>/paranoidfr33kTravis Whitneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02501996575083710753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-1179122017821304442007-08-06T18:40:00.000-05:002007-08-06T18:40:00.000-05:00Hi Madre!Of COURSE it was him. Who else? What a ...Hi Madre!<BR/><BR/>Of COURSE it was him. Who else? What a sicko. And what's worse...I never felt the need to tell anyone about his questions. I mean, you don't question your righteous priesthood holders, right??<BR/><BR/>Puking...Sister Mary Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00642154849765529070noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-51968194440696256212007-08-06T18:36:00.000-05:002007-08-06T18:36:00.000-05:00That really pisses me off! Was that Bishop Deim??...That really pisses me off! Was that Bishop Deim???<BR/><BR/>At one of my meetings with him, when you guys were very young teens, he said, "I'm really worried about V, when the boys start to notice how large her breasts are!"<BR/><BR/>I was dumbfounded, but then again, I was by everything he said and did! What a poor excuse for anything!<BR/><BR/>Sorry, sweetie...<BR/><BR/>aka madreaka madrehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15409603121301652779noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-32066763424347239162007-08-05T23:20:00.000-05:002007-08-05T23:20:00.000-05:00SML, I joined the church just before my senior yea...SML, I joined the church just before my senior year in HS, so I didn't have too many temple trips. Our temple was in Seattle, so I would have had to done fundraisers if I were to go. We were a poor family also.<BR/>Cele,<BR/>I was so fanatical, I always made my kids pay tithing...even before they were baptized. Thankfully, I have seen the error of my ways and tell the kids to put the money in the bank for college now.<BR/>Tithing...what a waste!<BR/>AKA EnlightenedmollyJulieOShieldshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17395064164084429746noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-4051395655307650692007-08-05T16:04:00.000-05:002007-08-05T16:04:00.000-05:00I've long suspected thong underwear were a highway...I've long suspected thong underwear were a highway to hell, which is why I've often enough wanted to remove them when I've seen them.Paul Sunstonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02462598852553696040noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-4952186465896442732007-08-04T23:58:00.000-05:002007-08-04T23:58:00.000-05:00Just recently a friend of my counted a story to me...Just recently a friend of my counted a story to me of a young girl and her thong underwear that was apparently enough for her bishop to call her in for a worthiness interview. Apparently you go to hell if you have thong underwear.Jeremyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11726005550858397355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-27360330398274852562007-08-04T04:03:00.000-05:002007-08-04T04:03:00.000-05:00I like the MWM and MWOM acronyms too. I touched o...I like the MWM and MWOM acronyms too. I touched on this subject a little bit in <A HREF="http://ex-mormon.net/young-womens/index.php" REL="nofollow">Young Womens</A> because in the "mission field" wards -- which generally cover a large geographic area -- you get the two side-by-side in the same ward.<BR/><BR/>In my family's case we were kind of between the two, though I guess leaning a little in the "WM" direction, so I don't have quite the horror stories CV Rick recounts in his fantastic memoirs. But there are some things that are the same for everyone who grows up in a gigantic extended-family clans: having almost all vacations either involve visiting relatives or be church-related (our whole family went to boy scout camp the same week as our ward's scout troop every year for years when I was growing up...).C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-24578207422390915212007-08-03T23:23:00.000-05:002007-08-03T23:23:00.000-05:00Cele ~ kids pay tithing from the time they are bap...Cele ~ kids pay tithing from the time they are baptized, in order to learn obedience to the laws of God.<BR/><BR/>Rick ~ yeah, he was slightly creepy.<BR/><BR/>Chanson ~ his was the only creepiness I had in my interviews as a youth, or as adult. I'm glad all he wanted was to pry for details, vs. what some women/girls had happen to them. Yikes.<BR/><BR/>Mark & BR ~ Mark's comment made me laugh too...although the situation was fairly harmless, so maybe only warranted a punch to the throat rather than the family jewels.<BR/><BR/>Beulah ~ yeah, so many fundraisers, so little time!<BR/><BR/>Paul ~ wow, that pastor's son sounds like a real piece of work. <BR/><BR/>FTA ~ makes you wonder if this type of questioning of girls was the righteous man's porn or what. Sheesh.<BR/><BR/>Sacred Sis ~ I'm not sure they sit up at night thinking of it, unless they already have a problem with temptation to fantasize about young girls. Not all bishops are that way, I'm certain of it.<BR/><BR/>Janet ~ wow! I'm sorry to say I was masturbating at a very young age...OK, I'm not sorry at all! But I can guarantee you that it wasn't something I got questioned on, rather it was something I confessed when I was ready to. Gawd, the horror! Also, bishops in the CHI (Church Handbook of Instructions) are encouraged to find out what kids are doing sin-wise while being very careful not to "educate" kids and thereby tempt them to engage in said sins.<BR/><BR/>JOOM ~ CV Rick came up with those abbreviations...you will want to check out his blog entries for HIS Growing Up Mormon memories...they rock.Sister Mary Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00642154849765529070noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-24310868984232365472007-08-03T22:15:00.000-05:002007-08-03T22:15:00.000-05:00I love the abbreviations of MWM and MWOM! OMG! I...I love the abbreviations of MWM and MWOM! OMG! I remember feeling like the bishies were next to god! So glad I don't have to subject myself or my children to their "worthiness interviews"!Just One of Manyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14224440009026865578noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-45554630466013671782007-08-03T20:47:00.000-05:002007-08-03T20:47:00.000-05:00My first interview with my bishop was creepy as he...My first interview with my bishop was creepy as hell! I remember it vividly. Bishop Wilcox was the man. I, too, didn't really know what to expect so I was nervous as well. (Perhaps it was really my underdeveloped intuition telling me that something wasn't quite kosher about all of this priesthood interview stuff.)<BR/><BR/>I remember, he asked me all the requisite questions about obeying my parents, keeping the WOW, reading my scriptures, saying my prayers, etc. Then he asked me, "Do you masturbate?" <BR/><BR/>I looked at him incredulously and, being 12 and naive, said, "What's that?" He then proceeded to tell me in explicit detail what that was. I answered that I hadn't ever and was horrified that he'd even suggested as much. I recall leaving his office and feeling violated and scared. I never told my parents what he'd asked until I was well into adulthood.<BR/><BR/>Ironically, I might have never considered or known about masturbation if he hadn't asked. The result of his asking was keen curiosity, to say the least! I've often wondered since how many young TBM kids end up engaging in sexual behaviors because their pervy bishops put the ideas in their otherwise naive minds?<BR/><BR/>In some ways, I'm grateful to that bishop... ;-0Janet Kincaidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01396294382570650966noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-38806034195339847212007-08-03T20:21:00.000-05:002007-08-03T20:21:00.000-05:00The majority of Bishops are like that... they must...The majority of Bishops are like that... they must sit up at night thinking of ways to embarrass young girls. I'm sure they get a kick out of watching them squirm and (for those that have kissed a boy) making them feel guilty. Gawd forbid you should have a normal existance and show interest in the opposite sex!<BR/>I was like CV Rick... I never trusted any bishops either. From day one I thought it was odd that they would expect us to confide in a bishop rather than our parents.<BR/>Just more brainwashing...An Enlightened Fairyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09165900747538235514noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-27239352226726504322007-08-03T19:39:00.000-05:002007-08-03T19:39:00.000-05:00What a perv. My friend had the SP keep questionin...What a perv. My friend had the SP keep questioning her like that about sex with guys when she wanted to go on a mission. She kept telling him, no, she'd never done anything. "Are you sure? Are you sure!??!?" Finally, she had to say, "Sheesh, I've never even kissed a guy!" Which was true. He left her alone after that.from the asheshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10505277568750065742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-67173846205886339982007-08-03T14:57:00.000-05:002007-08-03T14:57:00.000-05:00That might have been a very close call, Sister! I...That might have been a very close call, Sister! I wonder what happened to the girls who confided in him that they'd kissed a boy or two? <BR/><BR/>A few years ago, I met a father and his two sons, all of whom were pastors. They seemed uneasy, as if they were hiding something, and the conversation didn't last long. The next day, I found out why: The older son was on trial for statutory rape of a 13 year old choir girl.<BR/><BR/>As it turned out later, he was convicted.Paul Sunstonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02462598852553696040noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-30616433885024648072007-08-03T12:39:00.000-05:002007-08-03T12:39:00.000-05:00I don't remember any creepiness during interviews,...I don't remember any creepiness during interviews, but I think I was just lucky!<BR/><BR/>I do remember holding a yard sale at home to raise money for girls' camp one year. How embarrassing! The MWO came over to "help" me. I guess I was the charity case that week.Carmenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17916629746658653046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-9871076453092246592007-08-03T12:25:00.000-05:002007-08-03T12:25:00.000-05:00Mark,Now that made me laugh.Mark,<BR/><BR/>Now that made me laugh.Bishop Rickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05385909789743073477noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-66138797939200896132007-08-03T10:29:00.000-05:002007-08-03T10:29:00.000-05:00That bishop is a low-life bastard. Id like to sme...That bishop is a low-life bastard. Id like to smear a can of Alpo dogfood on his balls and then release a pack of hungry pit bulls on him.<BR/>I wish you would have kicked him in the balls on your way out the door.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-383124167275206402007-08-03T09:48:00.000-05:002007-08-03T09:48:00.000-05:00I remember what a big deal it was to go on a templ...I remember what a big deal it was to go on a temple trip when I was a teenager. The Chicago temple was brand-new -- it was one of the early small temples, a forerunner of the modern micro-temple -- and it was cool that there was finally one close enough that it was reasonable for our ward to plan a trip there.<BR/><BR/>I don't recall any creepiness in my temple recommend interviews though. My memories of the various interviews is pretty vague, so I may be blocking something out. ;^)<BR/><BR/>On the other hand, it might just be that if every single bishop were a creepy perv upsetting the kids, the church would have stopped this practice earlier...C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-66700328958106952672007-08-03T01:22:00.000-05:002007-08-03T01:22:00.000-05:00damned creepy bishop . . . I never trusted a singl...damned creepy bishop . . . I never trusted a single one of them.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32588204.post-65784077206779122802007-08-03T00:53:00.000-05:002007-08-03T00:53:00.000-05:00I never considered that you would have to pay tith...I never considered that you would have to pay tithe out of your babysitting money. And then to have him perv on you, ugh. Too weird.Celehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11471318342104018488noreply@blogger.com